Well, I didn't. Somehow sending out a bunch of e-mails just seemed dumb. It's hard for me to explain now that it's evening again, but I just couldn't bring myself to send out pseudo-passionate e-mails to people I see every day anyway. Today I did not fast, nor did I pray. I don't know why, it just didn't seem right. It would be awkward to fast while I'm home for the day, because everyone would notice and there would be a lot of questions to answer. Anyway, we had my Aunt and cousin over for supper, so that would have been really weird. I did spend much of the day looking at predestination stuff on the internet. I started with an atheistic view/attack on Romans 9, followed by John Calvin's take on it, and then an in-depth Christian refute of Calvinism with I only just started. The whole thing was beginning to make my head spin, so I cut it short for now. What I'm beginning to realize is that Calvinist predestination is incompatible with what I know of God from the rest of scripture. I'm not sure where that leaves me, except with the need for a lot more study. Lord be with me. Show me the truth.

Romans 9 is my all-time least favorite passage in the Bible, and it's something that I struggled with a lot that year. I still think predestination is an undeniable Biblical concept, and I still think that's incompatible with much of the rest of scripture. (Of course this was more problematic for me when I believed that the Bible was without error.)